Oh, dear. How time flies!

It has been a while since I’ve had time to breathe lately, and I apologize for my absence from the blogosphere. It’s hit that time in the semester when my days are spent at the campus coffee house, my nose buried in books, from sun up to sun down. For some reason this semester I am feeling like I have no motivation. I was talking to a few of my friends over the past few weeks about the fact that we all feel as though we’re stuck in MA-Limbo: done with undergrad, but not yet settled in a PhD program. I recently started working on my list of schools to apply to this summer, and it’s been a weird experience. I feel like I just got here and already, I’m planning out my next step and deciding where to move next. It’s hard to feel settled at all. If I thought last summer was bad, it’s nothing compared to now.

Now, I’m in limbo, but I have legitimate and intense work to complete. Now, I must work to get out limbo, not just wait. It’s not that I resent the work; I love it – really. It’s just hard to maintain my focus when all I want to do is start the next chapter of my life, the one where I will be settled for a few years once again. I miss feeling settled.

Well hello, morning.

Today was the first day of the rest of the semester. I have this strategy that I follow every semester. During the first few weeks (basically as long as I can manage it), I let myself sleep in in the mornings. During the very first week, I don’t even set an alarm. SSShhhh, I know. I can’t believe it either. It’s my little secret. And, now, yours. Once I determine that my reading list has gotten out of control and that my productivity level needs a good shot of adrenaline, I start the daily library trek. That’s right, 8 AM, hello wonderfully vacant first floor reading room with the tables near outlets and the big, bright windows.

As we walked to campus this morning, I mentioned to my neighbor that it seemed colder than usual today. She questioned this statement, saying she didn’t notice any difference. As I wondered why I would notice it and not she, I realized that it’s the first time in a long time since I’ve walked to campus so early in the morning. First day of the rest of the semester, indeed.

Back at UCF, I could usually bribe one friend or another to join me during these library stints, but I haven’t found a dedicated library buddy here at Seton Hall. It makes me a little sad (not to mention a little terrified of my impending crazy cat lady doom) to spend my days alone in the library, but I know I’m doing this to achieve my goals and to get myself where I want to go. It’s a tradeoff I’m willing to make right now.

That being said, I may have finally decided on a shortlist for applications. It’s exciting and terrifying all at once. I may share in a few days, we’ll see. In the meantime, if you happen to hear of a university with a fantabulous Medieval lit program, let me know.